Getting Over a Relationship – Where Do I Begin?
Sometimes, after a person breaks up with his or her partner, this person is unsure if the breakup is permanent or not. It is very hard to tell when a breakup is truly a forever thing. It is equally difficult to tell whether or not it would be prudent to try to get back together.
Relationships end with a breakup, but not all breakups end relationship. It is important to remember this because while a breakup will many times end a relationship forever, they don’t always. So, the problem is, was this a relationship worth pursuing again?
Should I Stay Away or Should I Go Back?
It is often happens that one of the partners who has experienced a breakup goes through the following days sad and wishing the whole thing had never occurred. It often happens at the same time, the other partner is going around also wishing the whole thing had never happened. Such a couple may be better served by contacting one another than by trying to adjust to a permanent breakup.
The only way to really find out if the other partner also regrets the breakup is to contact that partner. In most instances it is quite an awkward chore to contact a person you’ve recently claimed you never wanted to see again!
Approaching Your Ex
Even though it is very difficult and nerve-racking at best, finding out if you’re ex-partner also has regrets requires you contact this person directly. Hiding behind e-mails or having someone spy on this person as a means to getting his or her true feelings will inevitably backfire.
It would be best to phone the ex-partner. This is the most honest and upfront way to go about re-initiating contact. Tell him or her you’re feeling very down and you very much regret what has happened. Say that you think that the breakup is very wrong for you and you’re wondering if he or she feels the same way.
Is the Breakup Real or Not?
After making such contact with the ex-partner, one of two things will happen. He or she will literally melt and be very open to getting back together or there is something making him or her incompatible with you. If the latter happens, you’ll find in the long run the permanent breakup was the better way to go.
It is very unusual a person finds his or her life’s partner in the first relationship. It can happen, but it is unusual. Some studies say a person has as many as seven relationships before he or she finds the one that works out. So after breaking up, it is very important to figure out if this breakup is one that is making you realize you have found the person you can not be without, or if it is just one more step toward finding the right person.
It’s hard to tell whether a breakup was really a breakup or just a quarrel. However, by re-initiating contact with a person you have just broken up with, you may find the other partner is just as headed-over-heels in love with you as you are with him or her. Therefore, though it’s always awkward contacting the person you have just broken up with, maybe you’ll find a great relationship would have gone to waste if you didn’t.
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